Frappuccinos with My High School Best Friend

It was a lazy Saturday afternoon. I was just at home surfing the internet and watching some Korean dramas online. I received a text message from my high school best friend inviting me to have coffee at Starbucks. So we met. The last time we saw each other was last January together with some of our high school classmates.

It was just the two of us. We talked about her breakup with her boyfriend of almost 4 years and my marriage to my work and graduate studies. We also reminisced about our high school and college years.

Back when we were in high school, whenever we were required to write an essay about how we see ourselves 5 or 10 years from now, we envisioned ourselves with stable jobs and families of our own. Well, we both have stable jobs. But they are not the kind of jobs we envisioned. We are both single. She was supposed to get married next year but things didn't work out with her boyfriend. Me? I have other priorities and not even dating. So the family thing is still uncertain. Our focus right now is to work hard and save so that we'd be financially stable and independent if we get married some day.

It somehow amazes us that we turned out this way. We never thought that we'd experience quarter life crisis. We didn't anticipate that love could be that complicated. We never thought that to be promoted in a job, you need to work really hard and experience pain. We expected that life would still be simple. We were so naive. But even though we are in our mid-twenties, we are still dreamers. We still hope that whatever we wrote back then would still come true. We are living our lives to the best we could and making the most out of what is given to us.

I really had a great time with her. Even if we led separate lives during our college years, we still felt comfortable with each other. We both changed a lot. But the friendship stayed the same. Just like what we said in the middle of our conversation, guys come and go but true friends remain.

25vs13

"You should go out there and make them aware of your
presence!"

This may sound like a quote taken from an inspirational book but these words actually came from a 13-year-old girl giving me advice on dating. I found it very amusing how bluntly she could have thought of saying that to me as if I was walking around with the word "single" written on my forehead.

Although, her advice was rather interesting, I think that being already in my mid-20's, I have grown enough to become aware of the fact that there is more to life than just "going out there and finding love." I must admit, however, that when I was her age, I used to think that by the time I turned 25, I would have already bought a house, married the man of my dreams and maybe have a business of my own. Obviously, I was very naive back then because now that I am 25, not only have I failed to achieve any of those, I also have found myself living more than a thousand miles away from home, stuck in a job that is about to suck whatever's left of my sanity.

It is not easy being a 25-year-old lady these days; you would often catch yourself in a constant struggle to find different ways of making your dreams come true amidst incessant scrutiny from everyone around you. I agree that love and dreams make up the very core of our existence but unlike the 13-year-old girl who still has the privilege of choosing one more than the other, I am left with no other choice at this age, but to create a balance between the two.

Even if the harsh realities of life, love and dreams leave me heart-broken every now and then, I still wish to see the world in a light similar to that of the 13-year-old, who's seemingly unafraid of what the future holds and is bravely wanting "to go out there" to experience the fullness of life.

A Dinner with Middle-aged Couples

Today is the birthday of my boss. I had lunch and dinner at their house. I was supposed to go home immediately after work but my boss invited my co-teachers and I for dinner. So we went.

I noticed something at the dinner table. There were my boss and her husband, two of my co-teachers with their respective husbands, and me. They were talking about stuff only married people could relate to. They were also talking about things/events that happened during their younger years (they are all in their 40's). While me, a mid-20's single lady, just sat, ate, and listened.

Throughout the dinner, I was silently wishing that their attention would not focus on me since I stuck out like a sore thumb. If that happened, they would surely try to set me up again with random guys. I totally hate matchmaking. But I guess I didn't wish so hard because they mentioned this certain guy they have been wanting me to meet since February. I just smirked and looked the other way. I'm totally not interested.

Don't get me wrong. I don't hate their company. They are actually fun to be with even with the existence of a generation gap. But I wish they'd be more sensitive. It's not like they didn't go through young adulthood.

I miss having dinner with friends.

Window Seat

As the plane takes off and gains altitude, the blinking, glittering lights of Manila becomes farther and farther away, reminding me of what I was leaving behind. When the glare finally dims and all I see is the inky blackness of the sky, the last moments spent are all but a distant memory. The ominous glow of passing clouds makes me feel, at that single moment, the cushioned window seat is the loneliest place in the world.

photo credit: virtualtourist.com

hAy, look at the sun!

Awakened by the sound of my cellphone beeping, I decided to check who in the world sent me a message at 5:00 in the morning. Well, it turned out to be my aunt, with the message: "Make hay while the sun shines!" I must have already heard this idiom a thousand times and might have interpreted it a hundred different ways in the past but considering how early it was, of course, I wasn't exactly in the mood to take time to ponder nor reflect on it, so being still half awake at that time, I just clicked delete and went right back to sleep.

Fast forward to two and a half hours later, I found myself wide awake and finally ready to begin my day. Following my usual routine, I checked on my cellphone for any unread messages or missed calls. As I was browsing through it, I began to hastily remember my aunt's early morning message. "Whatever! How is that applicable to me?" I thought to myself as I was getting ready for work as though shrugging it off as something ridiculous.

Apparently, I did not convince myself well enough to stop thinking about it because somewhere along trying to survive another boring day at work, I suddenly caught myself thinking about what it really meant to make hay while the sun shines. Well, it wasn't because I could not comprehend the obvious but it was more of finding a way to make sense out of what it meant and making it more personal.

I probably must have thought about it all day that I barely noticed it was already time to go home. "Three more days before the weekend," I half-jokingly told one of my colleagues before signing out and taking off. While on my way home, I started my usual daily reflection of how my day went and unsurprisingly, I could not remember anything remarkable. Although, I was quite disappointed with myself for such an unproductive day, I was still very thrilled about the fact that the day went by quickly without me noticing it.

As I lie awake in bed, getting ready to call it a night, I still could not escape thinking about my aunt's message that morning. After deciding to give it much thought, I finally figured out its significance in my life. It suddenly dawned on me that I was living life as though I was waiting on something great to happen and might have failed to recognize certain opportunities that I may have come across with. How can I possibly make hay when I barely even notice that the sun does shine? The more time I spend thinking about it, the more I think of my mundane life as wasted time. How did I manage to live in oblivion all these years?

I think that more than the quote's obvious meaning of striking while the iron is hot, it is about cherishing every moment of our lives because in every second lies an opportunity to lead a better life, make our dreams come true and touch people's lives. Although, I still do not know what to make of this realization, I now find myself looking forward to making the most out of every sunrise while awaiting golden opportunities that would come my way.